


Soulmates

by Pikajimin



Category: Daenamhyup | DNH, Topp Dogg (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mental Health Issues, platonic namjin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-30
Updated: 2015-11-30
Packaged: 2018-05-04 03:19:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5318471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pikajimin/pseuds/Pikajimin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seokjin remembers where Hyosang doesn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Soulmates

         Seokjin has spent many lifetimes searching for his soulmate. He has met his soulmate many times and loved them each time. He had spent many years loving them, growing up with them and dying with them. His soulmate has taken many forms such as a childhood pet, a lion that had killed him, and his teacher. Seokjin has yet to find his soulmate in this life time.

          In this life time, he’s a trainee for an idol company. He’s made a few friends, but still he still feels like he’s alone. He still feels alone even though he has Namjoon, but the younger male is not his soulmate. He knows the other three kids’ names, but they scare him. Namjoon tells him that they are getting a new trainee today. All of the trainees are gathered in the studio. Seokjin sits close to Namjoon while the rest are gathered in front of the monitor. The door opens and a boy with a bowl cut walks in. His hair is brownish black, He’s lanky. The boy has to be no older than Seokjin. He introduces himself as Kidoh, but his real name is Hyosang. Everyone introduces themselves, but when it’s Seokjin’s turn he freezes up. Memories of past lifetimes flash through his mind. He vaguely hears Namjoon calling his name. He snaps back and everyone is staring at him. He gets up and excuses himself. He pushes past Hyosang, their shoulders bump and Seokjin feels the spark. He runs to the restroom and hides in a stall. He knows now that Hyosang is his soulmate. And knows the consequences of pursuing his soulmate in the idol world. He knows that he is going to hurt himself in the end.

“Seokjin,” Namjoon says.

“I’m fine, just give me a minute,” he says.

“I’ll wait,” the younger states.

“No, I’ll be there in a few minutes. Please Namjoon, just go,” he pleads.

          He hears the younger leave. He sighs. His memories flash back to a previous life where Hyosang didn’t exist. He spent that lifetime alone. Seokjin remembers everything, but Hyosang doesn’t. He leaves the restroom and goes back to the studio. Everyone is gathered around the monitor except for Hyosang. He’s sitting on the couch. Seokjin decides to sit beside him.

“I’m sorry about early. I’m not feeling good,” Seokjin says.

“It’s okay. I didn’t get your name,” Hyosang states.

“Seokjin,” Jin replies.

          Hyosang nods and focuses on what the others are doing. They ask Seokjin to sing a part for them and he does. He can feel Hyosang’s eyes on him. His voice cracks at that moment. They tell him to redo it. He does. His voce barely reaches the high note they want him to reach. Namjoon tells him to take a break. He leaves the booth and the younger male hands him a bottle of water. He sips it. Hyosang raises an eyebrow at him. Seokjin feels embarrassed. He sits away from Hyosang this time. He feels sick. He excuses himself again and runs to the restroom. He throws up his breakfast. Seokjin wipes his mouth with tissue and splashes water on his face. The door opens and Hyosang is standing at the door way.

“Namjoon told me to ask if you’re okay,” Hyosang informs.

“I’m fine,” Seokjin replies.

“Are you sure?” the ravenette asks.

“Peachy,” Jin says sarcastically.

“No need to get an attitude. I just asked because the others are worried about you,” Hyosang snaps.

“Sorry,” Seokjin whispers.

          They leave the restroom in quiet. The silence is heavy between them. They enter the studio again and everyone stares at Jin. No one asks if he’s okay. The two sit back on the couch. Seokjin remember a previous lifetime where Hyosang committed suicide before he got to meet him. He spent that lifetime alone. He’s brought back into reality when Namjoon touches his shoulder.

“You should go home today,” Namjoon states.

“I’m fine. I have vocal lessons in an hour anyway,” Seokjin says.

          Namjoon touches his forehead. Seokjin knows he’s getting sick. The younger male tells him to go home if he starts to feel worse. He nods.

“Jin, go home. Missing one practice isn’t going to matter,” Ikje says.

          Seokjin wants to tell him that is will matter. He wants to tell the elder that his voice is the only thing he has. He wants to tell Ikje that he needs to practice every day because he’s not as good as them. Instead he goes back to the dorm. He goes to the room that he shares with Namjoon. He lays down and bundles up in the blanket. He sleeps.

_A Previous Lifetime:_

_Seokjin is a nine year old kid when his mother tells him that he’s getting a baby sitter. His mother tells him that she has to work extra hours at the hospital. He nods his head. When his mother gets ready for work, the doorbell rings. He goes to open the door and a girl is standing at the door. She has short brown hair and a smile on her face. She says hi to Seokjin. In return he smiles back. His mother comes to greet her. The girl introduces herself as Hyori. Hyori bids Seokjin’s mother good bye. Seokjin is told to behave. He nods and tells his mother goodbye. Hyori asks Jin many questions._

_“What’s your favorite color?” she asks._

_“Pink!” he exclaims._

_“Isn’t that a girly color?” she questions._

_“Nope, mother says I can like it too,” he states._

_Seokjin doesn’t understand that she is his soulmate at this age, but he does know that he likes her. He spends most of his afternoons with her. One day, he tells her that he’s going to marry her. She ruffles his hair and tells him to keep his promise. Seokjin sticks out his pinky finger, and they promise each other._

_He turns ten a few months later and he no longer needs a baby sitter. They spend his birthday together. She brought him a present. The present is a handmade bracelet she made. He put it on and wore it. When it’s time for her to leave, she kisses him on the cheek. She tells him to keep his promise. He doesn’t break his side of the promise, but she does. When he’s sixteen, he sees Hyori with another man. Hyori and the man kiss. She has a ring on her ring finger, and he knows that she broke their promise. She doesn’t even notice Seokjin. He runs home and cries himself to sleep. He wants to take off the bracelet and throw it away, but he can’t. He knows now that Hyori and he are soulmates. But in this life time they do not end up together._

Present Day:

“Seokjin,” Namjoon says.

          Seokjin wakes up. Namjoon tells him that Hyosang is going to be sharing their room. The elder asks where Hyosang is going to sleep. The younger says that he’ll share a bed with him and Hyosang can take his bed. The elder male groans and moves closer to the wall. Namjoon sits on the edge of the bed. He asks Seokjin if Hyosang is his soulmate. Seokjin hesitates before nodding his head.

“What are you going to do?” Namjoon asks.

“Nothing, there is nothing I can do. If I decide to do something, one of us is going to get hurt,” Seokjin answers.

“You are going to get hurt more than him,” the younger says.

“It’s better me than him,” Jin replies.

          Namjoon crawls into bed and holds the elder close. Seokjin cries into Namjoon’s chest. The younger threads his fingers through Jin’s hair. Seokjin remembers the first time he met Namjoon. It was several lifetimes ago. Namjoon had run away from and had nowhere to go. Seokjin found him on his porch trying to get out of the rain. He took the younger in and let him stay. Every lifetime after that Seokjin will always find Namjoon. (Namjoon is just like him. They will always search for their soulmates.) Seokjin is thankful for Namjoon for always being there for him and vice versa.

          Hyosang walks in and stops. He mumbles that he walked into a very intimate moment and walks out. Seokjin wants to tell him that it’s not intimate. He wants to tell him that he doesn’t like Namjoon like that. Namjoon laughs. Seokjin pinches him. Namjoon snickers. The elder tells him to move because he needs to wash up, and the brunette does move. He grabs clothes and heads to the bathroom. The bathroom door is locked. He knocks on the door, but no answer.

“Hyosang’s in there,” Hunchul states.

“Great,” he mumbles.

“How are you feeling?” asks Hunchul.

“I’ve been better,” Jin answers.

          The bathroom door opens and Hyosang walks out with a towel wrapped around his waist. Seokjin walks past him and their shoulders brush again. The spark fills Seokjin with warmth. It gives him a sense of familiarity. This time Hyosang stops and stares at him. Seokjin looks at him. The taller male goes to their room. Seokjin knows that he’s not the only one that felt it. Hyosang did too. He goes to the bathroom and takes a shower. He takes his time and relaxes as the hot water hits his body. He steps out of the shower and dries off. He puts his clothes on and heads to the room.

Hyosang is asleep, and Namjoon is reading a book. He tells the younger male to move over and he does. He pulls the blanket over him and closes his eyes. He hears Hyosang’s soft snores and Namjoon’s even breathes. He thinks of a good way to avoid Hyosang, but there isn’t. He yearns for the other male and it hurts him so much.

Namjoon tells him to sleep. Jin tells him that it hurts so much not to have him. The younger knows that it hurts. He whispers comforting words to Jin. And the elder wants to believe him, but he knows how this lifetime is going to end. The younger male tells him to sleep again.

_A Previous Lifetime:_

_Jinah is the new kid and starts her first day at a new school. She gets there is welcomed by the councilor. She is handed her schedule. She finds her classroom and knocks on the door. The teacher tells her to enter. Jinah walks in the room and notices the bouquet of white tulips on a desk. The teacher asks her to introduce herself. She does. She gets seated next to the empty desk. Class continues and Jinah wonders why there are flowers on the desk. At break, a girl introduces herself as Namjoo. And Jinah knows the girl. They have spent many lifetimes together before this one._

_“Why did Ms. Park sit you there of all places?” Namjoo asks._

_“I don’t know. Why are there flowers on this desk?” Jinah asks._

_“The girl that sat there committed suicide yesterday,” Namjoo answers._

_“Namjoo, are you coming?” a girl asks._

_“I’ll meet you there, Yoonah,” says Namjoo._

_“You should go. She’s waiting on you,” insists Jinah._

_Namjoo leaves. Jinah lays her head on her desk and stares at the flowers. She feels sad even though she didn’t know the girl. She is brought back into reality when students come back to their desks. Class goes on. It’s lunch time a few classes later. Namjoo tells her to eat lunch with her and Yoonah. She does. They sit at a table in the cafeteria, and everyone is whispering quietly. Jinah asks them about the girl. Namjoo tells the elder that it’s not important. Yoonah tells her that that girl’s name was Hyori. Jinah can feel her heart shatter to pieces. She nods her head. She doesn’t want to know anymore._

_“She was depressed, at least that’s what I heard. Yesterday, they found her in her bathtub dead,” Yoonah informs._

_Jinah can feel tears fall down her cheeks. Yoona hands her a tissue. Namjoo wants to take it all back. She wants to pull Jinah into her arms as tell her that Hyori wasn’t her soulmate, but she doesn’t. She can’t. Because Jinah knows that it is true that Hyori was, is, her soulmate. Instead she tells Jinah that it’s okay. Jinah knows that it’s not okay. Her soulmate left her before she got to meet her. Yoonah excuses herself and leaves first. Namjoo tells Jinah that they finally found each other. Jinah tells Namjoo that she’s sorry. The younger shakes her head._

_“Jinah, I’m so sorry. I wasn’t going to tell you,” Namjoo states._

_“No, I should know. It’s my right to know,” says Jinah._

_“Is Yoonah your soulmate?” the elder asks._

_Namjoo nods her head. And Jinah is happy for her. She really is. Namjoo knows that the elder is happy for her, but she is also sad. The younger holds the elder’s hand. Jinah tells her that it’s okay. But it’s not okay, they both know this. When lunch is over, they go back to class. They sit in their seats. Jinah quietly goes through the things left in Hyori’s desk. She pulls out a notebook and flips through it. She finds doodles and writings. On one page there is a paragraph addressed to her._

_‘Jin, I’m sorry. We didn’t meet in this life. I’m sorry that you have to spend this time alone. I’m sorry that you’ll have to be lonely. In another life, we’ll find each other and we’ll be together. I won’t remember any of this or you for that matter. But make me remember. I’m sorry.’_

_Jinah cries. Tears fall down her cheeks. She wants to know how Hyori knew because she wasn’t supposed to remember. She wipes her tears away and continues to flip through the notebook. She finds a picture wedged in the back of the notebook. It’s Hyori. Her hair is long but her face is still the same, and so is her smile. She is smiling brightly. Jinah slips the photo back into the notebook. She reaches to the back of the desk and there is something else. She pulls out a bracelet. It was the same one she got before. School ends and Jinah is still sitting there. “You found the things left in her desk?” Namjoo asks. “How did she know?” Jinah questions. “In some lifetimes, the soulmates know a little bit about a previous life. Most of the time it is usually they only remember their soulmate’s names,” Namjoo informs. Yoonah comes to get the younger girl. Jinah tells them goodbye._

_She walks home a little bit slower. Her mother asks her how school went. She tells her that she made friends then goes up to her room. She plays music loud to drown out her crying._

Present Day:

          Seokjin wakes up at six in the morning. He wakes Namjoon up for school. The younger groans and gets ready for school. Jin makes breakfast for them. Hunchul comes out of his room and sits at the table, half awake. Ikje is next to leave his room to the table. The elder tells Jin that Donghyuk stayed at the studio. Hyosang is the last one to wake up. Namjoon says goodbye to everyone and leaves. Seokjin is the last to sit down and eat. Ikje and Hunchul head to the studio with food in hand for Donghyuk.

“Where did Namjoon go?” Hyosang asks.

“School, he’s still in school,” Jin replies.

“How old is he?” the taller questions.

“Seventeen,” answers Jin.

          Hyosang finishes and goes to wash his dishes. Seokjin tells him to leave it and he’ll do when he is done eating. Hyosang asks if he does most of the chores around the dorm. He tells Hyosang that the others are always busy and he doesn’t mind cleaning the dorm. The taller male hums as a reply. Seokjin tells him that he has to go to vocal lessons in a little bit, so he’ll be by himself for a few. Hyosang stops him and feels his forehead. He asks Seokjin if he’s feeling better. Jin holds his wrist to stop him. He feels the warmth from Hyosang. He pulls his hand away because it burns. “Sorry,” Hyosang whispers. Jin rushes to leave. He runs out the door and gets on the early bus. He gets to the company earlier than usual.

He waits for his teacher to get there. His teacher walks in and asks if he’s feeling better. He tells his teacher that he is and the lesson starts. It goes smoothly with minor bumps. His teacher tells him to take care of his voice as he leaves the room. He heads to their studio where Donghyuk and Ikje are usually at. He knocks on the door and opens it. The two males are sitting in front of the computer messing around with different things. He asks if they are coming back to the dorm. They tell him that they’ll be back for dinner, but they’ll leave again. Jin leaves the studio and goes back to the dorm. It’s only noon and he is heading back to the dorm.

He unlocks the door and Hyosang is asleep on the floor. Jin walks over to him and nudges him with his foot. The taller groans. “Hey wake up,” Jin says. Hyosang groans. A pen falls off his chest as he stretches. A notebook was lying next to him. Jin picks up the notebook and pen. “Put it down please,” Hyosang says. “There are beds for a reason,” Jin states. Hyosang sits up and grabs his things from Jin. “Is it pick on the new kid day?” Hyosang asks. The taller male gets up to leave when Seokjin grabs his arm. “Let’s go get lunch, my treat,” Jin says. And Seokjin can feel his hand burn. Hyosang yanks his arm from Seokjin’s grip. He mumbles that he’s not hungry and heads to their room. Jin follows him. The taller male is sitting on the bed. “Seokjin, just leave me alone,” Hyosang says. Seokjin closes the door and sits beside him. “Are you not feeling good?” Jin asks. He reaches up to feel Hyosang’s forehead. Hyosang is warm. Jin can’t tell if it is because of Hyosang or if the taller is getting sick. “I’m fine,” Hyosang says as he pushes Jin’s hand away.

They sit in silence. Jin wants to ask him if he felt the spark too, but he doesn’t. Instead he places a hand on the other male’s shoulder. He smiles softly at him. He doesn’t know what is wrong with Hyosang, but he tells him that it’s okay.

“Do you comfort everyone?” Hyosang asks.

“Not all the time and not everyone. I know what it’s like to be the new kid. It’s scary and you feel alone,” Seokjin confesses.

“Do the others comfort you or just Namjoon?” questions Hyosang.

“I’ve known Namjoon for a long time,” Jin says.

“How long?” the taller asks.

“Let’s go get lunch before Namjoon comes back and tries to eat everything on the menu,” Seokjin states.

          They leave the dorm and goes to a little restaurant not too far. They eat quietly with little conversation. Seokjin listens to Hyosang talk about music and how interesting it is to him. The taller male’s face lights up when he talks about things he likes. “Why did you audition?” Hyosang asks. Seokjin has no real answer. He just did because it felt right. “It felt right, auditioning for this company,” Seokjin answers. The taller male asks if he’s scared knowing that there is a possibility of not being able to debut. Seokjin wants to tell him that he’s more afraid of losing him to this industry. He wants to tell him that he’s scared that he’s not good enough. He doesn’t tell him. Instead he tells him that he’s a bit scared.

“What’s your favorite color?” Hyosang asks.

“Pink!” Seokjin exclaims.

“Isn’t that a girly color?” the taller asks.

“Not really,” Jin says.

          Jin remembers Hyosang asking the same questions and giving the same answers. After they finish eating, they head back to the dorm. Namjoon isn’t back yet, so it’s just the two of them. Seokjin makes a snack for Namjoon when the kid gets home. Hyosang asks if Namjoon gets spoiled by him. He shrugs his shoulders and says he owes the kid. Hyosang asks why. He just tells thing that he just owes Namjoon a lot. The taller male asks him what he likes the do in his free time. Seokjin replies that he likes to watch films. Hyosang hums. Seokjin places the snack in the refrigerator and goes to their room. He tells the taller male that he’s going to take a nap. He also tells him that if Namjoon comes home while he’s still sleeping, to tell him that there is snacks for the younger. Hyosang tells him sorry about earlier. Seokjin waves it off and goes to sleep.

_A Previous Life:_

_“My Prince, you must stay in your room,” Namjoon states._

_“No this is my kingdom as well. I will protect it!” Seokjin exclaims._

_“Your father tells me to protect you, and you would not let me. My Prince please do as you were told. We are under attack as we speak,” Namjoon explains._

_They hear the screaming and yelling. Seokjin is scared. He lets Namjoon rush him to his room. Once in the room, the younger male tells him to stay quiet and never let anyone in. Namjoon closes the curtains. He stands in front of Seokjin and places a hand on the elder’s cheek. “I’ll be back. Do not let anyone in even if it is me. Stay quiet and hide. Take care my friend,” Namjoon says softly. “Do not leave me. Please,” Seokjin pleads. The younger male shakes his head no and leaves. Seokjin is left alone in his room. He knows deep down that the younger is not going to come back. He waits anyway. He still hears the screaming and yelling outside the castle walls. He hides behind his bed when someone comes through the window. He places his hands over his mouth, so he won’t scream. He hears the footsteps walking around the room until they stop. The footsteps stop beside him and looks at the person. And Seokjin knows him. He stands up and faces the man. Seokjin has been looking for him._

_“Oh Prince, you flatter me with your presence, but I’m here to take you with me, he says._

_“I’d rather die than go with you,” Seokjin states._

_“So be it,” he says as he draws his sword out._

_“Hyosang,” the Prince says softly._

_“Prince come with me and I won’t kill you,” he says._

_“Why should I trust you?” Seokjin asks._

_“I have yet to kill you. I have been given orders to keep you alive,” the taller says._

_“I am not leaving my kingdom!” Seokjin exclaims._

_“Prince, you can either leave here quietly or not. I prefer the first option,” he says._

_“And if I don’t” the Prince questions._

_“I’ll take you with me the hard way,” he states._

_He puts his sword back and moves closer to the Prince. Seokjin’s chest and Hyosang’s chest are touching. The Prince can feel Hyosang’s chest moving up and down. The taller male leans in and grabs Seokjin’s shoulders and throws him over his shoulder. “Put me down!” the Prince yells. He tells the Prince that no one can hear them. And it’s true no one can hear them. “I’ll go quietly on one condition,” Seokjin tells him. “And that is?” he asks. “If I were to die tonight, then let me die by your hands,” the Prince states. “You were to die by my hands either way my dear Prince,” he says. Jin still goes with him. Hyosang is careful with the Prince. When they get to the next kingdom, the King wants to see the Prince with his own eyes. Hyosang takes the Prince to the King. “Your Highness, I have brought the Prince,” Hyosang says. The King scans the Prince up and down. The King stares at the Prince. “He’s under your care General. Get as much information out of him as you can. But before you leave, my dear Prince we have found something of yours,” the King states. The King tells one of the soldiers to bring out the surprise. The soldiers drags Namjoon out. Namjoon is beaten and bleeding. “Namjoon!” Seokjin yells. “Prince,” the younger groans._

_“Please don’t kill him! Let him free!” the Prince begs._

_“Why should I do that?” The King asks._

_“Kill me instead,” Seokjin says._

_“He is not going to be any help dead, your Highness,” Hyosang says._

_“Be quiet!” the King yells._

_“My Prince, it’s time to let me go,” Namjoon says._

_“Let him go and I’ll do whatever you want!” Seokjin yells._

_“Take him away General,” the King demands._

_Before Seokjin is taken away, Namjoon is stabbed from the back through the chest. The younger male screams in pain. Seokjin cries out. Hyosang drags him away. The Prince yells at him. He tells Hyosang to kill him. The taller male doesn’t. The Prince is taken to the General’s private quarters. Hyosang tells him to stay here and do not leave. Seokjin doesn’t answer him. He sobs and cries. Namjoon isn’t his soulmate, but someone dear to him. And it still hurts all the same. The General comes back a few moments later. “Tell me what your father has planned,” he demands. The Prince tells him that he’s not telling. He grabs Seokjin’s shoulders and squeezes them heard. The Prince refuses to tell him any information about their army or his father’s plans. He knows that Hyosang is only doing his job. The General leaves and doesn’t come back. The Prince sleeps on the bed._

Present Day:

“Seokjin,” Hyosang says.

          Seokjin opens his eyes and the taller male is hovering over him. Jin feels tears falling down his cheeks. He wipes them away.

“Are you okay? You were yelling for Namjoon,” the taller asks.

“Yeah, I had a bad dream,” Seokjin confesses.

          Hyosang tells him that younger male isn’t here yet. Jin sighs and gets out of bed. He goes to the kitchen and gets a glass of water. Namjoon comes back a few minutes later. Hyosang tells the younger male what happened with Seokjin. “Is he okay?” Namjoon asks. “He says he had a bad dream, but earlier he was acting weird,” Hyosang answers. Seokjin can hear them talking about him. He places the cup in the sink and stands against the counter. He knows that this lifetime is not going to go well.

“Jin,” Namjoon says softly.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Jin says.

“Then don’t talk about it. I’m not forcing you. I never was but if this is about that lifetime where I died protecting you then it’s over with. That lifetime has passed and I’m here with you, still alive and breathing,” Namjoon says.

“Namjoon, there’s a snack in the refrigerator for you. I’m going to take a walk,” Seokjin states.

          He starts to walk away and the younger male grabs his arm. Jin yanks his arm away from his grip. He goes to their room, grabs his mp3 player and a jacket. He puts his shoes on and leaves the dorm. He walks down the stairs. He listens to really loud rock music and just walks with no destination.

_A Previous Life:_

_Seokjin sits in the stands, watching Hyosang play basketball. Their team is winning so far. He roots for them. Namjoon and Yoongi are playing guard. Seokjin yells for them. At halftime, Hyosang searches the crowd for Seokjin. Seokjin waves at him. The taller male flashes a smile. Jin’s smile fades when the male turns around. The game continues and their team wins._

_“You were great out there,” Seokjin says._

_“Not really, I was feeling pretty off tonight,” Hyosang states._

_“Party tonight at my place, you’ll be there right?” Yoongi asks._

_“Yeah, we’ll be there,” the taller says._

_Seokjin tells Yoongi that he’ll see him later. The shorter male waves as he leaves. Hyosang places an arm around Jin’s broad shoulders. They walk out of the gym and towards Jin’s car. Hyosang tells him that he’s driving. Seokjin hands him the keys and gets in the passenger side. The taller male gets in and starts the car. Seokjin tells him to put his seatbelt on. The taller male does and they take off. They drive to Hyosang’s house. Seokjin follows him inside, and they go up to his room._

_Hyosang tells him that he’s going to take a shower. He looks around the room. There’s pictures of them when they were little. He smiles and misses those moments, where he doesn’t have to remind himself that in this lifetime Hyosang is his best friend and not his soulmate. He knows that the taller male is his soulmate, and he should tell the other male, but he doesn’t. Hyosang come out of the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist. Seokjin looks at the pictures above his desk. “What should I wear?” Hyosang asks. “Clothes hopefully,” Jin jokes. “Duh, I know that,” Hyosang states. “Wear jeans and a shirt,” Seokjin says. The taller male puts on a simple black tee and fitting jeans. Jin tells him that he looks nice. They leave and Hyosang drives to Yoongi’s place._

_When they pull up to the drive way to park, the music is loud and there are a lot of people. Jin feels out of place. Hyosang is greeted by everyone, and they congratulate him for winning the game. The taller male is handed a drink by Yoongi. Namjoon drags Seokjin outside._

_“Did you tell him?” the younger asks._

_“No, because I can’t just tell him ‘hey I’m your soulmate.’ It’s Hyosang we are talking about,” Seokjin states._

_“Seokjin,” Namjoon says softly._

_“Don’t start with me. In this lifetime we aren’t going to end up together,” Seokjin says._

_Hyosang comes up to them. He tells Namjoon that he’s going to borrow Jin for a little bit. Namjoon lets him. The taller male gently grabs Seokjin’s arm and guides them to an empty bedroom. Seokjin sits on the bed and Hyosang is sitting in the chair by the desk. They sit in silence for a few moments. Hyosang clears his throat before speaking._

_“What do you mean soulmates?” he asks._

_“What are you talking about?” Jin questions._

_“I heard you and Namjoon talking. You were saying that you and I are soulmates,” the taller explains._

_“A long time ago, several lifetimes ago, we met,” Jin says._

_“Did we love each other?” Hyosang asks._

_“Most of the time, other times we didn’t,” Seokjin informs._

_The silence between them settles in. “Soulmates are connected by souls only. Every lifetime they have to find each other. Sometimes one of them doesn’t exist. Those are the sad and lonely lifetimes,” Seokjin informs.  “Do they remember each other?” the taller asks. “Not all the time. There are rare cases which one person remembers several lifetimes,” Jin answers. Hyosang hums in response. Seokjin doesn’t know if the taller male understands him._

_Before long, the door opens and Namjoon and Yoongi are walking into the room, making out. Hyosang clears his throat and the two stop. Namjoon says something along the lines of ‘oh crap! Yoongi said no one should have been in here.’ The two leave the room. Seokjin walks out of the room and tells Namjoon that they were leaving. He also tells the younger that he’ll see him tomorrow. He walks down the stairs and through the sweaty bodies. Hyosang walks out after him, but it stopped by Namjoon. “Do the right thing,” Namjoon states. The taller male looks for Seokjin in the crowd. He pushes past people. Jin can’t go far, he still has his keys. He walks outside and Seokjin is leaning against his car._

_“I’m driving,” Seokjin says. Hyosang tosses him the keys. Seokjin unlocks the doors and gets inside. He puts on his seatbelt and tells Hyosang to do the same. Jin just drives._

_“You won’t remember this lifetime after we have died, only I will,” Seokjin states._

_“Why not?” Hyosang asks._

_“That’s just how it is. You won’t want to remember all the lifetimes before this one,” Jin answers._

_“Were there bad times?” questions Hyosang._

_“Sometimes,” Jin replies._

_“Tell me about them, the lifetimes before this one,” the taller male says._

_Seokjin does tell him. He tells the taller male about the one where Hyosang died before they got to meet. “I’m sorry,” Hyosang softly whispers. They stop at Seokjin’s house. The two of them get out of the car. Jin unlocks the front door and enters his house. They go to his room, so they won’t wake his parents up._

_“Stay the night, just for tonight. Tomorrow we can pretend that none of this happened,” Seokjin pleads._

_“It wouldn’t be fair to you if I pretend that none of this happened,” Hyosang stated._

_Hyosang kneels in front of Seokjin, who is sitting on the bed. He cups the older male’s cheek. Seokjin smiles softly. “How do you know that I’m your soulmate?” Hyosang asks. Seokjin places his hand on the taller male’s cheek. The spark warms Seokjin. Seokjin is welcomed with a sense of familiarity. “Did you feel that?” Seokjin asks. “It feels warm,” Hyosang replies. Jin nods. “That warmth tells me that your soul belongs with mine,” Seokjin whispers softly._

Present Day:

          Seokjin feels his arm yanked and he is being pulled backwards. He groans and his earbuds fall out of his ears. Hyosang stares at him. The taller male looks angry.

“Are you crazy?” Hyosang asks.

“Hyosang,” Seokjin says.

“Yes, my name is Hyosang,” the taller states.

“When did you get here?” the elder asks.

“I followed you after you walked out. Do you know how worried Namjoon is?” answers Hyosang.

          Seokjin doesn’t reply instead he turns around and walks the same way he came. He feels off, like something is not right. This has happened in a previous lifetime. He tells Hyosang that he’s not feeling so good. They rush back to the dorm. Namjoon is pacing the living room. Ikje, Hunchul and Donghyuk are back from the studio. Hyosang and Seokjin come stumbling through the door. Seokjin stares at the ground. He knows that the eldest is mad at him. He’s waiting for Ikje to start lecturing him. Ikje doesn’t lecture him.

“Do you know how worried we were?” Donghyuk asks.

“Namjoon called us after you ran out. He told us that you were having nightmares again,” Hunchul says.

“I’m sorry,” Seokjin says.

          Seokjin stands there. He feels the room spinning. He vaguely hears them call out his name. Next thing he knows, he’s seeing black and white spots before everything goes dark. His eyes flutter open and his head is pounding. He groans. He’s still alive. He’s in his bed.

“Seokjin,” Namjoon says.

“What happened?” Jin asks.

“That’s what I would like to know,” the younger says.

“This has happened in a previous lifetime,” answers Seokjin.

“What happened when you went walking?” Namjoon asks.

“I don’t know. I remember walking out of the dorm then nothing. Then Hyosang pulled me back into reality,” the elder states.

“I’ve heard about this from older people. It is said to be a myth because no one has seen it or experienced it.  If half of the soulmates no longer feel that spark then the other half will get sick. No one truly knows what happens after the one gets sick,” Namjoon informs.

“Stop, you’re scaring me,” Seokjin replies.

          Namjoon tells him that it will be okay. Seokjin doesn’t know if it will be okay. The younger male leaves the room and tells him to rest. A few minutes later, Hyosang comes into the room with a bowl of soup. The taller male tells him that Ikje bought them dinner. Seokjin eats slowly. Hyosang asks him how he’s feeling and Jin answers with an okay.

“While you are walking earlier, you looked so lost, like you didn’t know where you were or who you are. You didn’t even answer to your name. Where were you Seokjin?” Hyosang informs.

          Even Seokjin doesn’t have an answer for that. He doesn’t know where he was at that time. He eats the soup until there is no more. The taller male is sitting on the edge of the bed. Hyosang places a hand on top of Jin’s head and ruffles his hair. And Jin feels the spark. He feels the warmth. The spark is still there for him at least. It’s not enough to keep him going though.

“Do you feel that?” Hyosang asks.

“Feel what?” Jin questions.

“That warmth, it feels warm,” Hyosang answers.

          Seokjin knows now that he’s not the only one who feels it. Jin tells him that he must be running a fever. Hyosang tells him to take a nap.

“Tell me a story,” Jin says.

“Aren’t you too old to be told bed time stories?” Hyosang asks.

“Nope, never too old,” Seokjin jokes.

          Hyosang tells him to move over and tells him that this story doesn’t have an end. The taller tells him a story about a prince who gets taken by a general of a neighboring kingdom. Hyosang talks about how the prince’s friend was killed by the king. He speaks of how the prince told the general to kill him by his own hands. Seokjin asks how the story ends. Hyosang tells him that he’s not quite sure how the story ends. Jin thanks him and tells him that he wants to sleep. Hyosang gets out of bed and leaves the room.

          Seokjin wants to believe that maybe Hyosang remembers some of their lifetimes. He wants to believe that Hyosang is making up for all the ones he doesn’t remember or for the ones where he doesn’t exist. Namjoon comes into the room and asks him how he’s feeling. The elder says he wants to sleep. Namjoon tells him that he heard the story that Hyosang was telling him. It was a past lifetime that they shared together. Seokjin asks him if it is possible for Hyosang to remember any of their lifetimes. The younger shrugs his shoulders and tells him that there’s a chance that Hyosang only remembers them as stories. The elder stays silent and stares at the ceiling. Namjoon tells him to rest up because their boss wants a few progress tracks from them. The elder groans and tells him to sleep early. Namjoon nods and leaves the room.

_A Previous Life:_

_Seokjin is sitting in the corner of the room when the monster in the corner appears. He screams really loud. “Go away! Go away!” he yells. He screams and yells at it to leave but it doesn’t. It sits in the corner opposite of him. A nurse comes into the room and tells him that he needs to take his medicine. He screams at the monster in the corner. The monster in the corner disappears, but he’s still screaming. A doctor then comes into his room and kneels in front of Seokjin. The elder male doesn’t look at him. “Seokjin,” the doctor says. “Namjoon make it go away!” Jin exclaims. “Seokjin if you take your medicine then it will go away okay?” Namjoon says softly. Jin nods his head. The nurse hands Namjoon the pills and then the cup of water. The elder swallows the pills. “Good job Jin,” Namjoon whispers. Jin sits there until everyone leaves the room. He waits until the medicine kicks in. By the time his medicine starts working, it’s time for group therapy. A nurse escorts him to the room._

_The chairs are in a circle. Seokjin sees Donghyuk and sits beside the younger male. Other people start filing in. There’s an extra chair beside him. One more patient comes walking in and sits beside him. He knows the new kid. Hyosang, he whispers to himself. The new kid looks at him. It’s him, Seokjin thinks._

_Hunchul, the therapist, comes in after everyone is seated. Hunchul greets everyone with a smile and a good afternoon. Most of the people mumble an afternoon._

_“Let’s get started shall we?” Hunchul asks._

_“There’s a new kid,” Donghyuk states._

_“Introduce yourself to us,” says Hunchul._

_“Hi, my name is Hyosang,” Hyosang says._

_Everyone mumbles a hi back. Hunchul talks about how everyone should make goals for themselves. The therapist gives them several minutes to make a goal while they are still here. After minutes have passed, Hunchul asks around the room to say their goals aloud. He tells them that it’s okay if they don’t reach their goal in the future. “Goals can change,” Hunchul says. When they get to Donghyuk, he tells them that his goal is to write the perfect song before he leaves. Then it’s Jin’s turn. And Seokjin doesn’t really have a goal. He tells them the truth, there’s no use hiding it. Hunchul tells him that it’s okay, but Seokjin knows better. It’s Hyosang’s turn to speak. He says that his goal is to heal._

_At the end of the session, Hunchul tells Seokjin to stay behind. Jin tells Donghyuk goodbye. They wait until everyone leaves. “Seokjin, I’m going to have to start one on one sessions with again. You were doing so great. What changed?” Hunchul says. Seokjin doesn’t really know what changed. Everything has stayed constant for the most part. Hunchul tells him to go enjoy his free time. Jin leaves the room and goes to the recreational room. Donghyuk is sitting on the couch, notebook in hand, writing. He spots Hyosang staring out the window. “Can I sit here?” Seokjin asks. But the other male doesn’t answer. He sits anyway._

_“What’s it like to not be lonely?” Hyosang questions._

_“I wouldn’t know,” Seokjin answers._

_The two of them sit in silence until it’s time for them to leave. It wasn’t an awkward silence, but a comfortable one. (Their rooms are on opposite ends of the hallways.) Seokjin sits on his bed and stares at the walls. He thinks he sees the monster in the corner, but he blinks and it’s gone._

_At dinner time, Seokjin sits with Donghyuk. He asks the younger male how his song is going. The younger says that it’s going. Hyosang asks if he could sit with them. Seokjin nods his head and so does Donghyuk. Jin pushes his food around on his tray. The peas aren’t good to him. He picks out the carrots and eats them. He cuts the meat into small portions, but doesn’t eat it. Donghyuk tells him goodnight as he leaves. Hyosang and he are left at the table. Hyosang pushes his sweater sleeves up. Jin can faintly see scars on the other’s wrist. And he wants to ask, but he doesn’t. “How long have you been here?” Hyosang asks. “Almost two years,” Seokjin answers. The taller male hums as a reply. They are told that it’s time to go back to their rooms. Jin tells him bye before he leaves. A nurse escorts him back to his room._

_Once he’s back in his room, the monster in corner is sitting in his room. He closes his eyes and hopes that it goes away. He opens his eyes and it’s still there. A nurse comes by with his medicine. He takes it as fast as possible. It’s still there. This time it’s whispering the word ‘monster’ over and over again. He shuts his eyes tightly. He tells it to go away over and over again. He opens his eyes and it’s gone. He lays in bed and hopes that sleep would call his name soon._

Present day:

          Seokjin wakes up at three in the morning. Namjoon is beside him, blanket halfway off his body. Hyosang is on his laptop. Jin maneuvers his way around the younger male to get out of bed. Once he gets off the bed, he leaves the room. He goes to the kitchen and gets a glass of water. He leans against the counter and stares at the ground. He faintly hears a door open and close.

“Aren’t you supposed to be asleep?” Hyosang asks.

“Why aren’t you asleep?” Jin questions.

“I asked first,” the taller says.

“Couldn’t sleep, bad dream,” Jin answers.

“Working on a new song,” Hyosang states.

Seokjin hums in reply. He sets his glass in the sink. Hyosang grabs his hand and drags him out to the veranda. It’s a cloudless morning. The moon is out and it’s full. “It’s pretty,” Seokjin whispers. Hyosang hums. Seokjin stares at the sky. He closes his eyes and lets the morning air consume him. Hyosang is standing beside him close enough that their shoulders are touching. “Hey Jin, where were you earlier. I know I asked already, but I still want to know,” Hyosang asks.

Seokjin tells him that he’s not quite sure. He is drowning in his thoughts. He tells the taller male that he’s a little scared. The taller male doesn’t ask him why. Seokjin finds tears falling down his cheeks. “Hyosang, I’m sorry,” Seokjin says. Hyosang doesn’t know what he’s apologizing for, and he tells him Seokjin that. “I’m sorry,” he repeats. Seokjin wipes away the tears and sighs heavily. The taller male drapes an arm around Jin’s broad shoulders. He feels the spark, and he wants to give into the warmth. He feels warm and it stings a little. He wants to be selfish. So he does. He leans his head on the taller male’s shoulder. Hyosang doesn’t move away or tenses up. Jin feels at ease knowing that the taller didn’t. He looks at the taller male. He’s still the same after all these years, Jin thinks.

“Do you ever feel lost?” Seokjin questions.

“Lost in a literal sense or mental sense?” Hyosang asks.

“Mental,” Jin answers.

“When I’m writing music, I have writers’ block. I may produce a great song, but no words make sense,” Hyosang states.

          Seokjin hums. It’s quiet and both of them stop talking. Jin looks down at Hyosang’s hand that’s holding the railing. The taller male clears his throat. He moves his arm off of Seokjin’s shoulders. “We should go inside,” Hyosang says. And Seokjin doesn’t want to leave. He wants more of Hyosang. The taller male goes to leave, but Seokjin grabs his wrist. Hyosang freezes. On the inside of Hyosang’s wrist are white scars. The taller male pulls his arm back and goes inside. Seokjin remember seeing similar scars from a previous lifetime. He doesn’t know if they are recent or not. He hopes that the scars aren’t recent. He walks back inside and goes to the room. Hyosang is lying in bed, headphones on, listening to music. He moves over Namjoon and stares at the ceiling. Scars are supposed to go away after their lives have ended. Seokjin knows this because Namjoon nor he has any from a previous life. But the again they aren’t like Hyosang. He hopes that those scars are similar to birthmarks. He closes his eyes and tries to sleep.

_A Previous Life:_

_Seokjin finds himself swimming in the ocean. He has a tail with beautiful pink and blue scales. He swims around and floats along. He swims down and gets his hair wet. The moon and stars are out and it’s pretty. He waits until Hyosang comes out. The human male brings his friend to the beach on nights like this. It’s peaceful. Jin feels a hand on his shoulder and tenses up._

_“Seokjin, we aren’t supposed to be out this late,” Namjoon says._

_“I found him, Namjoon,” Jin states._

_“Jin,” Namjoon says softly._

_“Let me see him just once,” Seokjin begs._

_Seokjin is told no and taken home. Namjoon doesn’t want to risk it. They have heard stories of falling in love with a human. They know what happens when a human sees them. The human will fall for their beauty and want more of them. Seokjin doesn’t want Hyosang to only love his beauty. He wants the male to love him for him. Namjoon drags him inside his home._

_The next night, Seokjin sees Hyosang walking into the waves. He swims near the man, but not too close. He can hear the human crying. Jin wants to help. The male is getting hit with waves that could trap him. Hyosang goes under the water. Seokjin swims to him. The human is struggling to breathe. Jin goes under to bring him up to air. He pulls Hyosang up and drags him to shore. Hyosang coughs up water. The male opens his eyes. No one is there. Seokjin swims far away as fast as he can. He knows the rules, and he just broke one. The rule states that he must not save a human from the waters because the human will come back and try to find him._

Present Day:

          The alarm clock wakes Seokjin up. He then wakes up Namjoon. They leave the room and go to the kitchen. Seokjin pulls out ingredients from the refrigerator. “I talked to Hyosang this morning. I saw scars on his wrist. I don’t know if they are from a previous life or not,” Jin states. “Yoongi never had any on his body,” Namjoon says. Before the conversation continues, Hyosang walks into the kitchen. Seokjin focuses on cooking. Namjoon sets the table and pours juice into glasses. Hyosang sits at the table and waits. The others wake up on their own. They eat breakfast with minimal conversation. Donghyuk talks about the perfect song he produced. The younger tells Jin that he needs to sing in this track. Namjoon leaves for school and says that he’ll meet them at the studio. The rest of them finishes breakfast and gets ready for work. Seokjin washes the dishes.

          Jin is the last one to wash up and get dressed. Donghyuk, Ikje, and Hunchul left already leaving Hyosang and him. “Hurry up!” Hyosang exclaims. Seokjin is pulling on his pants when Hyosang opens the door. His pants are half on, half off. His black boxers are safely on though. He pulls his pants on and grabs his wallet. The two of them make sure the lights are off and lock the door on their way out.

“I’m sorry about this morning,” Jin says.

          Hyosang doesn’t answer him. They walk in silence to the studio. The air between them is suffocating Seokjin. He keeps walking. He hears Hyosang yawn. They enter the company and head to the studio. Hunchul is in the booth, rapping. Ikje and Donghyuk are at the computer. Ikje presses the red button and tells Hunchul to redo the last part. Hunchul nods his head. The music replays. Hunchul tries again and this time Donghyuk gives him a thumbs up. The younger male lets him listen to the guide track. Seokjin can hear Namjoon’s voice singing. He gets the melody and hums along. When the song is over, Donghyuk asks him if he’s ready to sing. Jin nods his head, and Donghyuk hands a paper with the lyrics on it. Ikje tells him to practice singing before he goes into the booth. He does. Donghyuk tells him which notes he needs to hit harder at a certain point in the song. He’s ready to record.

          Seokjin goes into the booth and puts on the headphones. The song plays through the headphones and Jin starts singing. Donghyuk stops the music and tells him to redo the last line one more time. And he does. He finishes the song with a few minor bumps along the way. After Seokjin’s turn, it’s Hyosang’s turn. (Hyosang’s husky voice fills the studio and Seokjin wants to hear his voice more.) Seokjin sits on the couch next to Hunchul. Hunchul asks him if he’s feeling better. Jin tells him that he is.

Namjoon comes in several hours later. He’s still wearing his school uniform. Not too long after Namjoon records, Seokjin is falling asleep on the couch. He didn’t dream this time. He faintly feels someone sitting close, so close that their shoulders and thighs are touching. It’s nice having physical contact like this, Seokjin thinks. It must be Namjoon. He feels fingers card through his hair. He hums softly.

“Seokjin, it’s time to go home,” Namjoon says softly. Seokjin wakes up, and Namjoon is sitting beside him. Hyosang is sitting on the other side of him. There’s at least a few inches between him and Hyosang. Seokjin looks at Namjoon with confused eyes. Namjoon shrugs his shoulders. Donghyuk tells them to go home. Ikje, Hunchul and Namjoon decide to stay and help finish the track. Hyosang and he walk back to the dorm. Their hands brush, and Seokjin desperately wants to hold the other male’s hand. They walk up the stairs today.

“Why do you owe Namjoon?” Hyosang asks.

“I just do. I owe him my life,” Seokjin answers.

          The taller male grabs him by the wrist and drags him up the rest of the stairs. “Hyosang, let me go!” Seokjin exclaims. Hyosang unlocks the door and drags Jin inside. “I heard you talking to Namjoon this morning,” Hyosang states. “Hyosang, I can explain,” Seokjin says. “I don’t want an explanation. Why are you telling him about my scars? Who are you to discuss something that doesn’t even involve you” Hyosang interrogates. The taller male lets go of Jin’s wrist. And Jin wants to tell him that he is involved with Hyosang’s life because Hyosang is his other half. “Hyosang, then tell me. Tell me about it,” Seokjin says. Jin grabs Hyosang’s wrist and lightly traces the scars with his thumb. He feels the spark and is welcomed with the warmth.

          He leads the taller male to their room. They sit on Hyosang’s bed in silence. They’re sitting so close. Their shoulders and thighs are touching. “Hyosang,” Seokjin says barely above a whisper. He wants Hyosang to remember what the taller male told him when they were inpatients. He wants to hear it from Hyosang’s own voice and not from a memory of a previous lifetime. He doesn’t force the taller to tell him. He doesn’t push or pull. He knows that Hyosang has a hard time telling others about his feelings. He waits patiently for Hyosang to gather his thoughts.

          Tonight isn’t the night however. Instead Seokjin moves so he can lays down. He pulls Hyosang close to him. Hyosang’s head is laying on his chest. Jin’s fingers are carding through the taller male’s hair. He hopes that this will lull Hyosang to sleep. He feels something wet soaking his shirt. Hyosang is crying. Seokjin hums a song softly. He wonders if the taller male can feel the warmth because he does. He hears a faint ‘don’t leave’ from Hyosang. (And for a split second Seokjin wants to believe that Hyosang remembers.) He won’t leave. He can’t leave because he will always find his way back to Hyosang. And Seokjin is fine living this lifetime like this as long as Hyosang is in his life.

**Author's Note:**

> 2jin for the win! Also platonic Namjin!


End file.
